Sometimes I think I appreciate milestones wrong. Right now I’m sitting here unable to sleep, watching “Teen Wolf,” a terrible MTV show that I’m reasonably sure I subconsciously selected is an effort to pretend I’m too young to have a kid who just graduated from preschool.
Now technically I don’t have a preschooler any more, I have a kindergartner which doesn’t seem right at all because I’m not even a proper grown up. I have a poster of a lobster in my living room and can’t seem to schedule dentist appointments at regular intervals.
My kid seems fine with the whole finishing preschool deal. The milestone is lost on her and I think it would be lost on me too if I hadn’t heard approximately 42951 heartfelt versions of “I can’t believe how quickly they grow up!” this graduation season.
Since I have heard 42951 iterations of “our babies are getting so big!” here I sit contemplating lobster posters, oral hygiene, and “Teen Wolf” which does not strike me as the type of thing the mother of a kindergartner should be doing. That feeling should inspire me to become interested in doing whatever it is I think such a parent should do but I don’t even know what that is. Ugly crying at baby pictures? Reading PTA handbooks?
Still if I managed to do this parenting thing without being a proper grown up yesterday I suppose I’ll manage tomorrow. Presumably my daughter will not look back on her childhood and think, “If only my home had no pictures of crustaceans and my mom never needed reminder post cards from the dentist!”
I can, however, picture her wishing I’d been less overtired and short tempered so maybe it’s time I turned off the angsty abs and went to bed.